Bullies

I get daily emails from The Pioneer Woman blog and on Saturday, the blog was a question about bullies, posted for PW by Heather Sanders.  Here's the blog post:


Need Advice. My Son is Dealing with Bullies.
Posted: 27 Apr 2013 03:00 AM PDT


Community Question is a category inspired by you. Here and there readers write in with questions that are better served by the varied, experiential knowledge of those who read and contribute in the comments. Please respond to this post in the comments, but if you have a question for the community email it to Heather.

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The following question is from Jenny M.

“I homeschooled my now 17 year old son until he was a Sophomore in high school. At that time, my three kids were put in public school. This year, my youngest went to Kindergarten in public school. Because of poor choices, one of our daughters has been brought back home to homeschool. I loved homeschooling and greatly missed it.

Our six-year-old has been through a lot this past month. First, his teacher, who he loved, quit her job to stay home with a newly adopted daughter. He’s had a hard time with this – not so much in what he says, but he’s just down about it. Last week, when I picked him up from school, I could tell something was wrong. After talking to him for a bit, he told me that a boy in his class pushed him and held him against a wall at recess. This continued, I guess, for most of recess. I told him that he needed to tell the boy to stop in a loud voice. If that didn’t work, then he needed to tell a teacher. I wrote the teacher that evening, and she wrote back and said she had addressed the problem.

The next day, the same boy pushed my son again. He told a teacher, and the boy had his recess taken away. Today I picked my son up and found out that while waiting to be picked up, a different boy came up to my son and punched him in the chest!!!! I told him that he needed to LOUDLY tell these boys to leave him alone.

I’m not sure what to do from here. The irritating thing is seeing how a young child’s innocence can be taken away by these things. Maybe these three incidents won’t do anything, but if this continues, it can have a big impact on his life. Now more than ever I want to bring him home and school him as I felt I should do in the beginning.”

Jenny wants me to ask “What are the community’s thoughts on this?” and say that “Any advice is very welcome.”

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Like Jenny M., I am concerned about how to handle bullying.  Even though my child isn't born yet, this subject is of great concern to me.  I can't stand bullies.  I hate bullies.  I loathe bullies.  Part of me just wants to spank their butts and give them a little dose of their own medicine and then give their parents a piece of my mind.  But, I'm more interested in why a person (child or adult) bullies; getting to the root of the fruit, so to speak, and dealing with the problem from its origination.  For today, my question is what would you do?  How do you deal with bullies if your child is the victim?  What if your child is a witness only?  What if your child is the bully?  What if you've addressed it and the situation hasn't improved?  What if the teacher/school won't listen or refuses to intercede?  What if their intercession has made the situation worse or is ineffective?  What if the bully isn't disciplined at school, even when his/her behavior violates school policy?  What if your child was disciplined for defening him/herself but the bully wasn't disciplined at all?  What if you've talked to the other child's parents and they blew you off, refused to listen or believe what you said?  What if the parents saw nothing wrong with their child's behavior?  At what point did you or would you step in?  At the first sign of bullying, when your child follows your advice and the bullying continues or gets worse, or when you first notice a change in your child's behavior as a reaction to bullying?  What methods have you used that didn't work?

All input is appreciated.

Snips & snails & puppy dog tails

There are some things in life that I have a severe dislike of and try to avoid at all costs. Things like snakes. Or sharks. Or hoards of spiders or other insects. Dealing with a couple of spiders is okay, but when a swarm of them comes out of an old piece of wood or a hole in the ground, I tend to get the shakes and almost puke and have a minor freak out. Also, the type of shoe I have one will play a large role in how I respond.  Flip flops = run away screaming. Boots or tennis shoes (aka sneakers) = stomp it to death. I know most boys like to dig in the dirt and shoot their BB guns and chase critters and pretend to be Daniel Boone or Davy Crocket, and knowing how my husband is, I'm sure our little man will be just like him and love snakes and terrorize me or scare the poo out of me on a regular basis as he grows.

I do not like snakes.

I do not like snakes.

I do not like snakes.

If I see a snake I will almost puke, a response I've had to them my entire life. I cannot explain it, I just don't like snakes. Poisonous, not poisonous - doesn't matter. I don't like snakes. Even if I see one on TV, I will start to gag. D likes to grab them and bring them in the house. What is wrong with this man? I don't understand. Leave them outside and preferably somewhere far away from the house. D has had hours of enjoyment from my phobia over the years. So, yesterday he sent me this:

     I was just sitting here thinking, what are you going to do when someday our little boy comes
     running in the house and says, "Mommy! Mommy! Look what I found!" And you turn around
     to see your little boy holding a snake in the house. You can't scream, he might drop it and it
     could go under the furniture. How funny will that be!!!! =D

He knows me too well.  And, oddly enough, I had had that same thought the day before. Snakes, frogs and other gross things in the house - I don't think I'm prepared. I'm not afraid of frogs, I just don't care to hold them. They're slimy and they pee on you. Or lizards. I had a pet iguana once, that didn't go so well, either. I would pick him up and handle him and pet him and whatnot, but he got loose in the house once and, needless to say, I stayed on the couch, like on the highest part of the back of the couch, while someone else hunted the thing down. He just darted everywhere and that gave me the willies. He ended up finding a new home with a Marine who let him ride around on his shoulder. I'm sure he was a much happier iguana with the Marine than he was with me. I like soft animals, like snuggly dogs and cats or horses or bunnies. I even like cute little goats (so adorable when the babies jump around) frolicky calves and fuzzy wittle sheep. Or lions and tigers and bears, oh my! They're adorable, not that I need to pet one, I just like looking at them and imagining that they can talk. I have issues. Yes, I grew up in the country, on a ranch, working horses and cattle and hauling hay and there have only been a few things in life that truly scare me or give me the willies. But reptiles ..... not my cup 'o tea. I can deal with dirt, mud, snot, poop, puke, fits, screaming, bumps, bites, bruises, fights, nightmares, blood, guts, sweat and tears, but if this boy brings a snake in the house, I may have a heart attack.  :)

DIY cleaner recipes

Here are a few DIY cleaning agents that I've seen on Facebook.  I did not save the info of who originally posted them and I have no idea who took the photos or who came up with the recipe.  I'm not trying to steal anyone's idea or photo, just sharing the recipes I saw that I really, really liked and that I think are very helpful!  Here's to cleaning and saving money while doing it!  :)


HOMEMADE FEBREZE

Ingredients:
1/8 Cup of fabric softener
2 Tbsp baking soda
Hot tap water
Spray bottle (i.e. an empty 27 oz. Febreze bottle)

Directions:
Using a funnel, pour the fabric softener and baking soda into the spray bottle.  Fill the bottle with hot tap water and shake well - making sure to twist the nozzle to the lock position if you're using a Febreze bottle.

Store-bought Febreze: $5.59
Homemade Febreze: $0.15
Total Savings: $5.44 OR 97.3%!



 
MATTRESS CLEANER

Ingredients:
Mason Jar
1 C baking soda
4 drops lavender essential oil

Directions:
Combine the baking soda and lavender oil in the jar.  Cover with the lid and shake well.  Using a mesh strainer, sprinkle the baking soda mixture all over the mattress and let it sit for an hour or more.  Thoroughly vacuum the mattress.

This will eliminate dust mites and other nasty things.  The baking soda helps draw up any moisture and deep dirtiness.  It also deodorizes and leaves the mattress smelling fresh and clean.




GROUT CLEANER

Ingredients:
7 C water
1/2 C baking soda
1/3 C lemon juice
1/4 C vinegar

Directions:
Combine all ingredients in a spray bottle and spray your floor.  Let it sit for a minute or two, then scrub.




A couple of personal notes:  Baking soda will help clean up doggie poo stains - including diarrhea.  After you pick up the "solids", pour the baking soda all over the "wet" area and let it set for several hours.  Using a vacuum that is not your "good" one (i.e. use a shop-vac), vacuum up the baking soda and the poo particles that you couldn't scoop up.  This works very well on the Big D - trust me, I had to do it twice thanks to Diamond having an upset tummy a few years ago.  There will be some stains left over, grab some Windex - just the regular blue stuff - and spray the stains.  I used an old toothrbrush to gently scrub in all directions, then paper towels to pat it dry and all of the stains came up completely.  You may have to repeat the Windex step a couple of times to get all of it up, depending on how bad your stain is.  If you're afraid that the Windex will discolor your carpet, test it in a discreet area first.  I use Windex to get out all kinds of stains in the carpet.  I told my mother-in-law about it and she used it on her carpet and made it look brand new.  She thought she was going to have to replace the carpet until she cleaned it with Windex.  Aaaaaaand, the generic stuff works just as well as the name brand.  :)

Shampooing the carpet

Being a dog owner and living in a pasture means that there's a lot of vacuuming done at our house. But, even with all of the vacuuming I still need to shampoo the carpet every few months. We invested in a good shampooer a few years ago that is for carpets, hard floors and furniture - something I recommend if you're going to shampoo your carpet or clean your furniture every few months, it's much more cost effective. I know I'm a clean freak, but let's face it, even without the dogs, is shampooing your carpet once a year (or less) really often enough? I think not. I want to get the carpets clean before Jakob's family arrives next week and I may do it again before the baby comes. Yes, clean freak, I know. Today was the day to clean!

Things were great until I ran out of carpet shampoo thirty minutes into my carpet shampooing endeavor. That'll piss you off. I guess next time I'll check my stores of shampoo before I begin. However, the light at the end of this tunnel came when I remembered someone telling me that vinegar or Windex could be substituted - both of which I have plenty of. I'm not into smelling vinegar (peeeee-youuuuuu) unless I'm cleaning my drains at the beginning of the month, so I went with Windex. Good old, plain, blue Windex. I actually used the Walmart generic brand, but it's the same stuff. It worked awesomely! Just as well, if not better, than the high dollar carpet shampoo I've been buying! I didn't even use it full strength, I diluted it just like I would if I'd used the 2X concentrated shampoo. And no, my house does not smell like chemicals. Honestly, I don't smell the Windex at all. And it didn't discolor the carpet, either. I was told once that the commercial shampoos will leave a residue on your carpet that over time will actually attract dirt (I have no idea if that's true or not), but that vinegar or Windex won't do that. Time will tell.

So, today's tidbit of homespun wisdom is that you can save yourself a lot of money by subbing generic Windex ($1-$2 per bottle) over the high priced carpet shampoo ($10-$15 or more depending on what you buy). Happy shampooing, peeps!

Trophies

I'm going to preface this post with this warning:  I'm probably going to offend someone.  And if that happens, it is not my intent, but I realize that it is an inevitable side effect.  Don't take what I say personally; I'm not attacking anyone as an individual or being malicious, this is just my opinion.  You don't have to agree, but if you comment, please be civil - no name calling or insult throwing.  Thank you.

This morning, while I was laying in bed and trying to convince myself that staying in bed all day long was an acceptable way to spend my day I suddenly began thinking about trophies.  I'm not really sure why, it's not something that I normally think about.  But, I was contemplating how trophies are handed out to kids and adults alike for simply participating in a competitive event - which is something that I find to be fundamentally wrong.  A trophy is for the person, group or team that wins.  It's for the person or persons who worked the hardest, wanted it the most, and performed the best.  It's not for those who lost or gave a half-hearted effort, didn't attend meetings or practices, and knew that they didn't have to give 100% because they would still get an award in the end.

When I was a little girl, if we were not on the winning team, we didn't get a trophy or medal, we got a piece of paper or a ribbon showing that we participated.  Whoopee.  I hated that piece of paper and the participant ribbon; it meant that someone beat me and I didn't like that.  There were some events that I knew I would never win, like the 50 yard dash, but I still gave it my all and I NEVER expected a trophy or medal for coming in 6th or 7th.  But, in strength events I always expected to be in the top three and when I wasn't, I learned how to deal with loss.  There were a few other girls that I knew were as strong or stronger than I was and we would generally round out the top 5, with three of us getting a medal.  Again, if you were in 4th place or lower you didn't get a medal and you learned how to deal with loss.  Even in intramural sports I wanted to be on a team with girls that I knew would help our team win and if I were on a team with girls who didn't know how to play the game and didn't care to learn, I would be mad because I knew that I was going to have to make up for their lack of desire.  I was going to have to work harder to overcome the obstacles between me and at least the top three.  I did not want to be in last place or even next to last place.  I'm not big into trash talk, I'm more of a let your work speak for itself kind of gal.  But, I always wanted to win.  It didn't always happen, but it was always what I wanted.  Last year at a kids basketball game I overheard the coach ask one young lady if she was giving it her all and she flat out said, "No."  She didn't make any bones about it, she just flat out wasn't giving her best effort and she wasn't going to give anymore than she already was.  That may be fine in events where you're just learning and it really isn't about the win or lose, but this was a competitve game.  I repeat, this was a COMPETITIVE game.  Comptete, that means you're challenging the other team to see who's top dog.  If you're not going to give your best effort to help your team win, then keep yourself on the bench, be a cheerleader or sit in the stands.  Having just one person on a team who doesn't give 100% can suck the life out of the rest of the team.

I think that it's important to teach children that they won't always win and they're not going to receive an award for losing.  Is losing fun?  No, and that's the point.  Is it hard to see your child lose?  Yes, but that is a fact of life.  I'm not looking forward to the day that I see my little man suffer because he lost at something he really wanted, but I do feel prepared for how to teach him to deal with it.  Life is full of personal wins and losses and if you've never been taught how to deal with loss as a child, then you're probably not going to know how to deal with it as an adult.  And trust me, I've seen a lot of grown men and women have tantrums and break-downs and boo-hoo sessions because they weren't recognized for losing and they just couldn't understand why they didn't get an award for their efforts.  Yes, A for effort, but it doesn't entitle you to an award.  A hand shake and a thank you are more appropriate.  I'm all for recognizing when someone does a good job, but if someone does a better job, then guess what?  You came in second.  You want that salesman of the year award?  Hone your skills, put in the hours and work for it.  If it continues to be unattainable, maybe you aren't a salesman and you need a change in career?  Recognize where your strengths are and refine them; make them shine so bright that your weaknesses look smaller and smaller.  Some people are not destined to be in management because while they are awesome at their current job, being a manager is not something they would excel at.  Or maybe they were passed over for promotion.  If that is your limit, recognize it and be the best you can be at your current job and improve your skills for the promotion you want and if that's not enough then consider changing jobs.  I want to run a marathon, but I know that I'm not going to win; it's something I want to do as a personal goal.  I do not expect a medal for my effort.  Yes, it would be a personal achievement and you know what?  I get to enjoy the satisfaction that I achieved my personal goal of completing a marathon.  I don't need a medal or ribbon or certificate of participation telling me "Yea for you!" 

I'm not saying we shouldn't encourage children to be a part of a team, but when did it become such a bad thing to foster a little bit of a competitive spirit?  When did losing become "okay" and striving to be the winner become "bad"?  I do not understand this philosophy. 

After we got up we were watching The Dan Patrick Show and oddly enough they were also talking about trophies.  (Great minds think alike? haha)  Dan commented that he doesn't agree with everyone getting a trophy because it devalues the trophy.  Amen, I couldn't agree more.  And that just about sums it up.

A few small wins

Sometimes, you have to take stock of the things you've accomplished and not focus on the things you weren't able to get to so that you don't feel like a complete failure.  So, here are a few things I accomplished last week:

1.  I shaved my legs. Twice. It's getting harder and harder for me to bend over or lift my leg up high enough to shave, so the fact that I managed to do this is awe inspiring. Control your giddiness, please. However, I will say this, you would think that my leg hairs would grow like weeds since I'm on prenatal vitamins.  My hair (on my head) is super thick and growing uncontrollably, but my leg hair is very short and soft.  ???

2.  I did an all over body scrub. Nothing like silky soft skin to make you feel better.

3.  I had my hair colored. Another feel good move - highlights and red that matches my roots = awesome!

4.  I had my eyebrows waxed. This is one of life's little pleasures. I absolutely love getting my eyebrows waxed. I don't have a lot of dark hairs, mine are mostly strawberry blonde, but it gets rid of all the peach fuzz and makes me feel clean.  And cleanliness is next to Godliness.  :)

5.  I had a pedicure. I can no longer reach my feet with ease, so this was a must. I gave myself a pedicure a couple of months ago and I told D that I wouldn't be doing that again; it was time to farm that duty out and pay someone else to do it.

6.  I had a manicure. I just haven't felt motivated enough to do my nails like I normally do and they were looking pretty ragged and tired. And there was no way that I was going to my own baby shower with raggedy looking nails.  This is also the reason I had my har did (that's "hair done" for you northerners and foreigners, this refers to a cut, trim, perm, color or any other fancy thing you pay someone to do to your hair).

7.  I didn't eat ice cream for breakfast. I had my oil changed and the shop is right across the street from Braum's. Shawna and I had made an ice cream run earlier in the week and I'd been craving a Reese's Mix ever since. I had about 20 minutes until my hair appointment and I REALLY wanted that mix to supplement the Cheerios I'd had 45 minutes earlier. But, I resisted and man, was it tough! I drank my water and pretended to be happy about it. However, on an epic fail note, I had Orange Leaf twice.

8.  I didn't buy ice cream when I went grocery shopping. Oh, I went down the aisle, but I bought frozen fruit and yogurt bars, instead. The Blue Bell tubs of Butter Crunch and Red Velvet Cake were calling my name, but I just told them to shut up and I walked out with something a little healthier.

9.  I took several naps. I used to think that naps were overrated, but the older I get, the more important naps have become and the more the better.

10.  I received a lot of nice gifts from friends and family at my baby shower. My friends/hostesses made everything look very nice and I loved the country/cowboy decor!  Now I have a few things left to buy and since I have less than 2 months to go, I need to get on it! If anyone would like to loan me their credit card, that would be awsome blossom! :)

Laundry lesson

See this green towel?

It used to be beige like these.

Until someone washed it with a green sweatshirt and a black sweatshirt.

Now we have two green towels and two beige towels. My OCD anal retentiveness is about to explode!

Can't.

Have.

Non-matching.

Towels.

New towels are on the Walmart list. Lol ;)

Obsessed with toilet paper

As a pregnant woman, I have become way too acquainted with public bathrooms in recent months.  And I have just one question, whose idea was it to put the toilet paper dispensers so low to the ground?  I realize that I'm tall for a girl, but when we sit on the toilet, that's irrelevant.  I don't understand the logic behind putting the toilet paper dispenser so low that you have to bend ALL THE WAY OVER to get to it.  What is up with that?  It would be uncomfortable if I wasn't pregnant, but with a basketball sized middle, bending over to try to get to the toilet paper is just exhausting.  Even a handicapped person has to be ON the toilet and if they have physical disabilities, they may not be able to bend over that far.  Raise the toilet paper dispensers, please!

And when did they start putting toilets right next to the stall wall?  Like so close that when you squat down, your hips touch the wall.  That's just gross.  Or my butt is just fat.  I'm going with gross.  And doors that open inward to a stall that's already too small to accommodate a hobbit?  Sometimes I wonder what contractors, designers and owners are thinking when they design their bathrooms. 

The grossest thing I've experienced in my new relationship with public bathrooms was a woman who didn't wash her hands, but knew I was in the stall so she pretended like she did.  No kidding.  She turned the water on for one second ..... literally, one second.  Then she ran her hand under the automatic dryer to make it come on, but she apparently didn't know that I heard her open the door and I saw her shoes exit the bathroom, so I assume the rest of her body went with her feet.  GROSS!  Wash your hands, you nasty thing!  And this was at Walmart, so if you think that there's no need to wipe down and disinfect the cart when you come into the store, you'd be mistaken.  There are non-hand-washers touching everything in there!  Okay, I'll stop so we can all go puke now.

In other news, we're out of toilet paper in the spare bathroom.  Guess who changed the roll?

I got whewed

During my 29th week of pregnancy, I went to Walmart to pick up the bathroom basket I'd ordered and I had on what I thought was an unbelievably cute outfit.  I felt good that day and was strutting my sassy pregnant stuff as I walked back to the photo department when a man approaching me from the opposite direction looked down at my belly and said, "Wwwwwwwhhhhhhheeeeeeewwwwww!" with raised eyebrows as he passed by.  Not like, "Hey, there's a hot mama," but like, "Holy crap!  That woman is HUGE!"  I ignored him and kept walking, but on the inside my mouth was gaping open, my eyes were wide with shock and I was screaming, "What the ****?!"

I realize that my tummy is growing exponentially these days, but really?!  My tummy warrants a "Whew!" from strangers at 29 weeks?  Oh, honey, please.  I'll admit that some days our little man is riding low and I can barely walk, like an old milk cow with a full bag.  But, on that day, he was in his normal position and I don't think I was even waddling.  Here's my pregnant hormonal advice for the day:  I do not want to be whewed by anyone but myself or my hubby until I'm about 36 weeks along.  So, until then, hold your tongues, peeps.  And, like Thumper says, "If you can't say something nice, don't say nothin' at all."  :)

On another note, I want another 3D/4D ultrasound so I can have another picture of his face.  It's more like I NEED another one.  I don't feel impatient for him to be born (Who's ready for dirty diapers?  Not this girl!), just impatient about seeing his face.  Does he look more like me or D?  Does he still have his Daddy's cleft chin?  Does he have his Daddy's long, beautiful eyelashes?  Oh, I sure hope so!  I keep telling myself that I only have about 8 weeks to go and to just be patient.  Prayers for patience appreciated.

And if you know anyone who'd enjoy being my unpaid dirty diaper changer and spit-up catcher, let me know.  :)

We were burgled!

A few nights ago while D was digging some hamburger meat out of the freezer he discovered a loaf of Italian french bread that the plastic wrapper had somehow been torn off of. It was partially freezer burnt, there went $4 down the drain, so we set it out to soften up for a day or two so we could throw it out for the critters to eat.

Two nights later we went to Click's for dinner - the loaf was still sitting on the bar. Don't ask me why. I'm not entirely sure how it sat there for two days. I'm going to guess that it's because it was cold and rainy for two days and neither of us felt like going out in the rain to throw it out. When we got home this is what we discovered:

The wrapper was on the floor, as was a magazine that had been on the bar and the only thing left on the bar was the paper towel the loaf had been sitting on. We had been burgled!! And the suspects were still in the house! Both of them cowering and shaking and pointing their paw at the other.

"It wasn't me!" Marilyn declared.

Diamond didn't utter a word. She's been through this before and she's well aware of her right to remain silent.

There were bread crumbs strung across a ten foot area of the carpet (I know it's hard to see in the pic) and when I pointed it out to D he asked the girls, "Is this where the murder occurred?" Neither was willing to fess up. Diamond tried to melt into the floor, believing that the flatter she got, the smaller she would become and then we wouldn't be able to see her and Marilyn hid behind my legs.

Honestly, I'm surprised the loaf of bread lasted two days before they got to it. When they were about a year old D had made himself some pizza for lunch one day and halfway through his meal he realized that the girls were nowhere to be found. And puppies are like small children, if you don't see or hear them, they're into something. He walked to the kitchen and there he saw Diamond with her front feet on the counter and Marilyn sitting on the floor, so excited that she couldn't control herself and her butt and nub tail were wiggling violently. Diamond picked up a piece of pizza and dropped it to the floor for Marilyn and then took the rest of the pizza for herself. Needless to say, D was laughing too hard to discipline them and was glad that Diamond had shared, so he just went back and finished his own piece of pizza.

I wasn't quite so nice when I caught her. I was deboning a rotisserie chicken from Walmart and I had a sudden emergency that led me to the bathroom. I had to leave the chicken right where it was - this was an EMERGENCY. A minute or so later Marilyn came running into the bathroom and she was terribly worked up about something. She was crying and whining and she would run up to me then run back out to the bedroom and I could see that she was looking at something in the kitchen. Finally, I caught on that she was being a tattle tail and I tried to hurry. When I came out of the bathroom, there was Diamond, with her front feet on the counter and her nose buried in the chicken, half of it already eaten! I did not laugh. As a matter of fact, there was quite a bit of yelling and swearing and foot stomping and discipline was issued. That was our dinner! Marilyn rested secure in the knowledge that she hadn't partaken in the thievery and wasn't in trouble and walked around wiggling her butt while Diamond was in a serious time out. It's like a normal time out, except Mom keeps yelling while you're in time out because she doesn't feel like you've fully grasped the terribleness of your heinous crime. However, with this bread incident, I laughed and I laughed for a l-o-n-g time. Their bellies were so full of bread that they were in food nirvana and spent the rest of the night like this:

And they must have had a super fun evening because the blinds on the back door were messed up; I assume because both girls lost their mind when they saw Kitty Kitty eating his dinner.

Today's lesson: don't leave food out where a very large German Shepherd can get to it and share it with a short, blonde wiggly-butted Cocker Spaniel. You'd think after 10 years I wouldn't need to remind myself of this. I'm a slow learner. :)

Sacking groceries

What is it with people not knowing how to properly sack groceries? The last few times I've been to the store the cashier/checker/whatever their title is now had absolutely no clue how to sack groceries.

I worked at two different grocery stores when I was in high school and both of them trained their employees how to properly bag groceries. Do not put mouse bait in with the produce. You'd think that would be a no brainer, wouldn't you? Don't put shampoo, paint thinner or household cleaners in with foods. Don't smash bread, chips, light bulbs or other fragile or soft items. Don't put all of the heavy items in one bag. If you have boxes (like crackers, etc) use them on the sides to stabilize the bag and fill the middle with other stuff, heavy items on the bottom and light items on top. Put the chicken in a bag of its own. Don't set canned goods on top of produce. Just a few suggestions, here - all of which seem like common sense to me.  But, as we are learning on a daily basis, common sense isn't so common anymore.

I place my groceries on the conveyer belt in the order I want them bagged and it never ceases to amaze me that some nimrod will not follow the order I have and will fish around through all of the items and put all of the lightweight items in one bag, then put all of the heavy items, like canned goods, in another bag or smash my bread or break my light bulbs. What is the logic behind this? I don't understand. And don't think that I won't express my disgust to the cashier. I bring my own cloth shopping bags and they're much sturdier than the plastic ones, but that doesn't mean that you should sack all of the heavy items in one bag. I still have to carry it! So, unless you're going to follow me home and unload the groceries for me, don't be a jerk and bag them incorrectly.

Thank you.

Rant over. It's a Monday. We're allowed to rant on Monday, right?

New organizer

I am one of those anal retentive individuals who likes to have all of her crap hidden behind closed doors.  I like organization, everything with a place and in its place.  I dislike clutter, however I routinely have a large amount of it in my home, I'm not sure how that happens, I blame it on living with the opposite sex.  It took me a while to get used to the glass front cabinets in our kitchen and I always make sure the dishes are "just so" and if they get messed up, I HAVE to fix them.  I also put all of our bathroom towels away with the folded side out because it looks neater and I can't stand to see the unfolded side sticking out.  Boy, don't you wish you lived with me?  I sound like a barrel of fun.  Don't worry, I don't gripe when it's not done my way, I know I'm anal and I just fix it and go on.  D used to purposely mess them up after I'd fix them and after a few weeks of that, I lost my mind and had a meltdown he quit.

When we lived in town, D and I had separate bathrooms and I had bought him a small container to put his countertop items in to keep them organized and out of the way.  When we moved here several years ago we merged into one bathroom.  And ever since, I've been looking for some sort of organizer or box or container to put all of our crap in.  But, it had to be pretty, not necessarily fancy, but not ugly and I wanted a flip-top lid to keep dust and powder out.  About two weeks ago I got all hard core about finding a container of some kind, I'd finally had my fill of the bathroom counter clutter.  I spent hours in stores and online looking for something.  Finally, I found one that I thought would work, but having had buyers remorse before, I didn't order it right away.  Instead, I looked at the clutter for another week before pulling the trigger.

Here it is in place.  This is the Household Essentials Paper Rope Curved Basket that I ordered from Walmart.com.  It was $19.97 when I ordered it and this week it's been rolled back to $15.47 with free shipping to your local store.  I got mine in less than 5 days.  I wish that the bottom were perfectly flat and not woven, but it works and it hides all of our crap and it makes me happy.  D walked in, saw it and said he didn't like it and that it was too big.  I told him tough.  :)

Nursery night light

Our nursery will have a cowboy/western theme to it - not overpowering, but a nice blend.  I don't want a TON of little cowboy knick-knacky stuff, but just some nice western accents.  I decided I didn't want a run of the mill night light and wanted to make my own out of an old cowboy boot to sit on top of the dresser.  I perused the online world for some lighted branches and I was surprised that so many of them run on batteries, which won't work for me.  I finally found what I was looking for at Illuminated Garden.  I chose the natural willow branch because it wasn't too frilly and the lights looked like they gave off a nice, warm glow, nothing too bright - this is a night light, after all.  I don't want it to keep our baby up, just give a little light to the room.  I posted on my Facebook page that I was looking for an old pair of cowboy boots, nothing that looked girly and in stepped my pastor, Mike, with a good, worn pair covered in cow poop.  Exactly what I was looking for!  Seriously, that's exactly what I was looking for.  I didn't want something that looked brand new, I wanted it to look well worn and broken in.  I used a rag, old toothbrush and warm water to clean off the exterior and then I vacuumed out the inside.  Lastly, I rubbed mink oil all over it and, jump back Loretta!  Look at the difference!

I wanted to put some flowers in with the lights, but again, it needed to not be girly looking.  I thought a little greenery and some kind of berry would be nice, so after I let the boot sit and absorb the oil for a couple of weeks I went to Hobby Lobby and bought my floral stems.

 

And here's the final product!  I am so unbelievably happy with how it turned out and when the lights are off it looks wonderful - just the right amount of light.  The project cost me about $38 total (lights, floral foam and stems) and I had it put together in just a few minutes.  I'm thinking about making another one for the living room or another room and putting flowers in it to dress it up a little.  I am in love with this light!  :)

DIY hospital gown

I decided that I would make my own hospital gown for when our baby boy is born.  I will preface with this:  my sewing skills are VERY basic.  I learned to sew from my Grandma Lois, who taught me how to make simple Barbie doll clothes, and my aunt Eileen.  I took one year of Home-Ec and learned a little bit more, but I use my skills only on occasion and I don't usually do any fancy stitching.  I tend to stay with craft projects, curtains, pillows and such.  However, I did make about 30 lavender-peppermint eye pillows for my Yoga class a few years ago and almost 20 Christmas stockings for all of the little kids in the family.

I googled DIY hospital gown and I found this link:
http://kmshomecreations.wordpress.com/2012/09/23/diy-hospital-gown-maternity/

It's a blog entry with some photos and tips about making your own hospital gown.

Here's the link to the printable pattern:
http://www.lazygirldesigns.com/hospitalgown.php

These are the supplies I started with, plus my sewing machine:  3 yards of fabric, one roll of ribbon, thread, velcro and snaps.  I think I spent about $30 at Hobby Lobby.

I varied from the pattern just a wee bit.  Instead of making a left and right back, I made two rights to make the garment a little larger, a tip included on the pattern.  I have about 9 weeks to go and I don't know exactly how big I will get, but I wanted to make sure I had room to grow.  I taped all of the printed pieces of the pattern together without making the lines connect.  If you look at the photo, you will see gaps in the lines, I did this to make it longer.  However, it was still a little short for me; I'm 5'8" and it was above the knee.  So, I decided to add a pleated extension to the bottom.  I don't have a serger so I used a 1/4" hem all the way around and I doubled it over so there were no raw edges exposed, so technically it was a 1/2".  The pattern called for using ties along the back to close it, but I didn't think laying on a bunch of knots would be comfortable so I used velcro, each piece cut to 4.5" long, spaced 3" apart and I left about 10" without velcro at the bottom.  I also ended up not using the snaps because those little boogers were too tough to get separated.  Who wants to deal with that?  I was going to use them along the top of the shoulder instead of velcro, but just went with velcro in the end.  The pleated extension added and extra 10", but after hemming and matching it gave a little more than 8" and that was perfect.  The pleat was not included in the pattern, I just did it freehand.

Here it is before I added the ribbon and the pocket.

After I added the bottom ribbon trim.

And here is the finished product!  I know you can barely see the pocket over the right breast, but I assure you it's there.  And, I will add that this is the first time I've ever made a buttonhole.  Like EVER!  I told you my skills are basic.  The pattern calls for a 4" buttonhole under the pocket (in case you're hooked up to a heart monitor, the wires have a place to go in), and my sewing machine has a buttonhole foot, but it won't make a 4" buttonhole.  I figured I could straight stitch an outline and then go back over it with a tight, short zig zag.  A quick text to my aunt Eileen confirmed it and after practicing on a scrap piece, it only took a few minutes to finish.  Originally I was going to sew on the ribbon, however I ended up using Heat-N-Bond tape and it worked beautifully!  No puckering and it lays flat and smooth.  The bottom ribbon is bonded all the way across the front and back.  The top ribbon is bonded only along the front, leaving the back free to tie and cinch up a little.  I did stitch the top piece under the arms at the end of the bond tape, just to make it more secure.  If you use ribbon, make sure you burn or serge the ends to keep it from raveling.

 

This was a fairly easy DIY project, but I'm slow because I don't sew very often and this is the first time I've used a pattern in several years, so it took me a little longer than most.  But, as I got into it my knowledge came back to me and I didn't have any trouble.  It's not good enough to enter in the county fair or anything, but I think it's pretty and it will look good in pictures when our little man is wearing his OSU onesie!  :)

The flashlight game

I heard about the flashlight game in one of my weekly emails from babycenter.com.  The basic concept is to place the flashlight against your belly and your baby will react to it by reaching for it and trying to play with it, thus causing your belly to move for all to see.

You can see a little bit of my very stretched out tattoo.  "Tis a cowgirl.  What else did you expect?

I held the flashlight in one place for a little bit and when it didn't move, I'd pick a new spot.

Kind of looks like lava flowing into my belly button, huh?

And alas, much like the pencil test, this game of hocus pocus didn't really work.  After about 10 minutes of trying to get a reaction I gave up.  And, of course, as soon as I took the light away my little man started moving.  Typical kid, they never show off when you want them to.

A couple of nights later, I was adjusting my sleep position in the middle of the night (can I get a "Hell yeah!" from all the current and former pregos out there?!) and I rolled onto my right side to try to ease some hip pain.  He must have not liked it and it must have squished his little feet because about 3 seconds later he started kicking me repeatedly on my right side.  Not like he was putting pressure on me to try to create space, oh no, it was a repetitive "Get off of me, woman!" kind of kick.  I adjusted a little so that my belly wasn't resting so much on the mattress and that still didn't suffice, so I ended up having to roll back onto my left side.  I had to laugh because this is SO something that my claustrophobic self would do.  "Hey!  You're cramping my space up in here!  Shove off, man!  I can't breathe!"  And then I thought what if he acts like me?  Noooooooooooo!  Oh, honey, I will be one very frustrated individual if he acts like me.  One of me is enough, two is too many.  Let's all join hands and pray that he inherits none of my unlovely traits.  My husband thanks you.

The mother ship has failed me

Last Monday night we were all set and ready to watch the Cardinals play the Diamondbacks for opening day of the 2013 MLB season. The game came on at 9:00 our time and at 9:45 the screen suddenly blacked out. There were a few "What the ....." and some "That's bull****" uttered around the room. I've waited months for baseball season, don't block me! A message appeared on the screen and I went to the website that was listed and according to that, we shouldn't have been blacked out. So, I told D to call our satellite provider and find out what was going on.

It turns out that it was not the satellite provider, but the network carrying the game that decided to black it out in our area about 3 or 4 innings in. What a bunch of caca! We pay to have that channel and then they just black us out?! I am outraged.

The game was being carried on a channel owned by The Mothership. If you watch or listen to The Dan Patrick Show, you know who I'm talking about. The satellite provider said they didn't have an alternate channel set up to carry the game because it wasn't supposed to be blacked out. However, they already had an alternate set up for the following night.  Later in the week, another network (one dedicated solely to professional baseball) blacked us out of another Cardinals game.  What the what?!

Is it just me or does it seem like a huge disservice to customers and just downright highway robbery for a network to do this? I can't believe that it's even legal. We pay for their service, they should provide it. Call me old school, but I think that if you're paying for a service, you ought to receive what you pay for. Apparently, that's too much to ask for in our greedy society. I'm not sure if we have to pay extra to not be blacked out or if there's no way around it. Either way, it's a ripoff because we've already paid for the channel.

Rant over. You may now return to your normal patrol. Peace out, peeps!

Do you scuba?

A week or so ago while watching the 60 Minutes teaser showing Anderson Cooper scubadiving with crocodiles in the Nile River, I said to D, "That's stupid!  You won't catch me doing that!"

"That's because you don't scuba dive and you don't go into murky water," he said.

Well, it's kept me safe thus far.

A couple of years ago we took a class called "Try Scuba" while we were on vacation in Florida.  It was a cheap way to see if scuba diving was something you'd like to learn to do.  There was classroom work for the first half and then we all went out onto a boat in one of the cays and did practical exercises before they would take you down, up to 40 feet.  Is that how you say it when your diving down?  Up to 40 feet?  Or is it down to 40 feet?  Hmmmm......

We were both very excited as the class started and they passed out face masks and talked about safety precautions.  I won't deny my fear of things in the water, namely Jaws.  I saw all of the movies, I know what that beast can do and I have no interest in being his lunchtime appetizer.  Maybe I'd be dessert because I'm so sweet?  And I know about stingrays and other naughty sealife that can kill you.  Plus, I watch Shark Week every summer, I'm completely educated about the risks of murky water.  Before long it was time to head down to the boat.  I slathered on some sunscreen and then applied 3 or 4 more coats.  We piled onto the boat and took a 10 minute ride to the diving spot, which by the way, wasn't murky.  It was crystal clear blue and beautiful.  And I almost died.  I think.

D and I were in one of the last groups to go.  I didn't feel myself start to get panicky until I actually put the breathing apparatus in my mouth.  At that point, I began to feel like I did the day I got my belly button pierced.  I didn't particularly like the mask because of the suction effect, but I was dealing with it.  There was just something about the breathing apparatus that really made me feel uneasy.  Then we had to go underwater.  Mind you, the water was about 4 feet deep.  I knew that I wasn't going to die, but I'm here to tell you, I went under the water for 0.394 seconds and immediately came back up.  The rest of the group was under, just hovering for about 10 seconds, getting acclimated.  As soon as D came back up I said, "Honey, I'm sorry, but I don't know if I can do this."  He offered some encouraging words and I was using every calming technique I could think of to deflate the panic that was about to explode out of my body and keep my heart from rupturing as it beat uncontrollably.  It was beating so fast and hard that I was afraid the thumping of it would reverberate and attract every shark for 10 miles.  I attempted to go under and stay under several more times and I think I may have maxxed out around 5 seconds.  Plus, something was going on with my mask and it kept slipping while at the same time, it felt like it was crushing my sinuses.  Then, we were going to have to do a rescue maneuver, taking our breathing apparatus out of our mouth, simulating that we lost it, and then have to capture it and put it back in our mouth.  Let me make this clear, this was not something that this girl was going to do.  I just couldn't.  The mere thought of losing my breathing apparatus suddenly almost sent me over the edge.  I continued to apologize to D and the instructor and the rest of the group.  I must have looked pitiful because D said something along the lines of, "Aww, honey," as he was trying to fix my mask for me.  The instructor woked with me one-on-one and then another instructor took over.

At this point I should probably tell you that I'm extremely - and I mean EXTREMELY - claustrophobic.  Like I can't be pinned under the bed sheets claustrophobic.  Elevators don't really bother me, but if I can't move my arms and legs I will panic and go into super ninja mode and whip everyone's a** who's trying to prevent my escape.  I'm like a caged wild animal.  Many moons ago, before D realized how claustrophobic I am, he pinned me under the covers once - and only once.  I quelled my panic and slowly said, "Get off me."  When he didn't comply, well you can guess what happened.  Sheets flew, screams were uttered and I turned green and grew huge muscles as the Hulk came out of me.  I thought I was going to die.  When the ordeal was over I was standing beside the bed, heaving up my lungs as I gasped for air and D was still in the bed covered with sheets and pillows.  Initially, he thought that he could somehow help (force) me to get over the claustrophobia, but over the years he's figured out that that ain't a-happenin'.  And this is something that has always been a part of me.  Grandma Lois used to tell the story of how she would swaddle me when I was just a couple of weeks old and I hated it so much that I would wiggle out and she'd almost lose me.  I don't like to be cocooned or wrapped or hindered.  Set me free!!!!!!

This is why claustrophobia is relavent - if you're claustrophobic, you will have major trouble scuba diving.  As the second instructor worked with me, I finally told her that I didn't want to waste her time or mine and to just work with D and I would be fine with not going scuba diving.  At first, she tried to convince me to keep trying and then I told her the bed sheet story.  Ohhhhhhh," she said.  I think she had an aha moment and she immediately understood my situation and gave up.  I went back to the boat and she and D went diving and he had an awesome time.

On the way home, I sounded like I'd been snorting chlorine and I was completely plugged up with sinus drainage and pressure.  And I had a migraine.  Something about the pressure of the mask and the water and the stress just did me in.  I continued to apologize to D and I felt bad because I just couldn't do it.  He later told me that he knew as soon as we went under the first time that he knew by the look on my face that I was done.  And when the instructor began trying to convince me to keep trying he thought, "Lady, you can talk to her all day long - this ain't happening."  LOL he knows me so well.

Everytime I see someone diving I think how cool it is and I wish I could do that.  But, let's face it, scuba diving is not in the cards for me.  And if you're as claustrophobic as I am, it's not in the cards for you, either.  So, stop laughing.  :-}

Walking routine #2

Here's another typical walking and toning routine that I use.  Once again, the walking intervals are 5 minutes long and I walk at 3 mph at a 1% - 2% incline.  You can adjust that to your own fitness level whether you want to run or power walk.  For this routine you will need a fitness ball and weights for the donkey kicks, front raise, side raise and upright row - I used 10's.  For the toning/strength moves, do three sets of 8-10 reps (total of 24-30 reps).  Each toning/strength interval should take you less than 5 minutes.  For the plank / side plank - 1) start in a plank position and count to 8 - remember to breathe, 2) roll to the left and do a side plank, count to 8, 3) roll back to plank and count to 8, 4) roll to the right side and do a side plank, count to 8.  Repeat 4x.  The planks can also be done on your knees or for an added challenge, do single leg planks and lift your top leg (your body should look kind of like a star) for the side planks.  At 7 months pregnant I'm doing the full plank, so you can, too!  :)

Walk
Plank / Side Plank
Ball Back Extension
Walk
Hip Countdowns
Table Opposition Lifts
Walk
RT Donkey Kicks
RT Side Lying Angle Leg Press
RT Heel-Toe
Walk
LT Donkey Kicks
LT Side Lying Angle Leg Press
LT Heel-Toe
Walk
Front Raise
Side Raise
Upright Row
Walk
Side Lying Ball Abduction - RT & LT
Side Lying Ball Adduction - RT & LT
Ball Rollout Lunge - RT & LT
Stretch


I do this routine in about 50 minutes and with my modifications for pregnancy I still burned over 350 calories.  So, push yourself a little and you should get a good burn.  Also, doing the leg/hip isolations (donkey kick, angle leg press, heel-toe) all on the right and then all on the left will give you a good burnout for the muscles in that area of the body.  You'll also get this with the repetitive shoulder work.  Play with the routine and add some pulses or weights to get a little more challenge.  If there are any moves you aren't familiar with and would like more explanation of, let me know!

Happy glute burns!  :)